2026
Who needs enemies when you have faggot democrats trying to call for treason. www.perplexity.ai/page/reti…
Whoever that former intelligence official was, give that man the medal of honorary retard. these faggots are so mad at success they have to make shit up. www.perplexity.ai/page/anal…
that’s because it’s telling you what you probably wanna hear www.perplexity.ai/page/zans…
Personal info and location remain FOIA-redacted.
⸻
WEYLAND-YUTANI CORPORATION
Building Better Worlds
⸻
INTERNAL MEMORANDUM
Classification: Corporate Confidential Distribution: Restricted Subject: Cultural Conditioning Protocol Operation Codename: XENOMORPH WEEKEND
Participant: █████ █████ Location: █████████████████ Duration: 72 Hours
⸻
CORPORATE OBJECTIVE
Expose participant to key Weyland-Yutani historical events, documented encounters, and adjacent cultural media relating to Xenomorph Organism XX121 and associated synthetic behavioral studies.
Secondary goal: maintain morale through controlled food intake and recreational simulations.
Reminder: The organism remains company property.
⸻
DAY 1 — FRIDAY
PHASE 1: INITIAL CONTACT
10:00 — ORIENTATION MATERIAL
Read Aliens: Dead Orbit by James Stokoe.
Purpose: introduce claustrophobic operational conditions and confirm that space is a terrible place to be hunted.
⸻
11:30 — INCIDENT REVIEW
Watch Alien (1979).
Case Study: Commercial towing vessel Nostromo.
Corporate Note:
Crew expendability protocols were functioning as designed.
⸻
13:45 — NUTRITION BREAK
Acquire lunch from ████████████.
Recommended fuel profile:
• sub sandwich • burger • carbohydrates
Employees exposed to extraterrestrial organisms should remain well fed.
⸻
14:30 — SIMULATED SURVIVAL TRAINING
Play Alien: Isolation.
Operational conditions:
• lights off • headphones on • maintain situational awareness
Corporate disclaimer:
Survival probability remains statistically low.
⸻
18:00 — EVENING MEAL
Obtain pizza from ████████████.
Advantages:
• portable • minimal distraction • compatible with emergency evacuation procedures
⸻
19:00 — INCIDENT DOCUMENTATION
View:
The Beast Within: The Making of Alien
This documentary reconstructs early corporate containment failures.
⸻
20:00 — MILITARY RESPONSE REVIEW
Watch Aliens (1986).
Case Study:
Colonial Marine expedition LV-426.
Operational takeaway:
Large weapons are effective until they are not.
⸻
22:30 — NIGHT OPERATIONS
Consume:
• popcorn • sour gummy worms (approved Chestburster Simulation Snacks)
Begin audiobook:
Alien: The Cold Forge — Alex White
This document demonstrates why corporate research facilities should probably not contain xenomorph eggs.
⸻
DAY 2 — SATURDAY
PHASE 2: ENGINEER TECHNOLOGY
⸻
10:00 — ANCIENT ORIGIN FILES
Watch Prometheus (2012).
Subjects covered:
• Engineer civilization • biological weapons • extremely bad expedition planning
⸻
12:30 — BLACK GOO LUNCH
Acquire Asian takeout from ████████████.
Recommended items:
• udon noodles • beef and broccoli • heavy soy sauce
Dark sauce coloration approved for Black Pathogen Aesthetic Continuity.
⸻
13:30 — SYNTHETIC PERFORMANCE REVIEW
Watch Alien: Covenant (2017).
Primary observation:
Android David demonstrates initiative well beyond acceptable limits.
Corporate recommendation:
Do not allow androids to study poetry unsupervised.
⸻
16:00 — SYNTHETIC DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM
Watch Raised by Wolves (Episodes 1–3).
Key topics:
• android parenting • religious philosophy • extremely uncomfortable philosophical questions
⸻
19:00 — PRIMARY DINNER EVENT
Prepare:
DECONSTRUCTED PHILLY CHEESESTEAK
Ingredients:
• shaved steak • grilled onions • peppers • melted provolone or cheese sauce
Prepared in skillet or bowl.
Corporate note:
Structural bun integrity deemed unnecessary.
Approved beverages:
• cola • coffee • stout beer
Designation: Black Goo Hydration Protocol
⸻
20:00 — RECENT INCIDENT FILE
Watch Alien: Romulus (2024).
Operational characteristics:
• return to industrial horror environment • improved practical effects
⸻
22:30 — TACTICAL SIMULATION
Play Aliens: Dark Descent.
Mission directive:
Keep Colonial Marines alive longer than historical precedent.
⸻
DAY 3 — SUNDAY
PHASE 3: REPLICANT CASE FILES
⸻
10:00 — CYBERPUNK FOUNDATION
Watch Blade Runner (Final Cut).
Corporate issue:
Replicants developing inconvenient levels of emotional awareness.
⸻
12:30 — NOODLE BAR PROTOCOL
Consume ramen or pho from ████████████.
Recommended viewing atmosphere:
• dim lighting • rainy cyberpunk mood
⸻
13:30 — FUTURE REPLICATION FILE
Watch Blade Runner 2049.
Topics of interest:
• artificial memory • identity stability • very large holograms
⸻
16:30 — EXPANDED UNIVERSE BRIEFING
Read comic crossover:
Fire and Stone / Life and Death
These files connect:
Prometheus Alien Predator
into a single highly questionable corporate timeline.
⸻
19:00 — FINAL DINNER
Prepare either:
• extremely large baked potato or • loaded fries
Corporate codename:
THE MARK WATNEY SPECIAL
⸻
20:00 — FINAL FILM
Watch The Martian (2015).
Corporate note:
Refreshing example of space exploration not immediately becoming a disaster.
⸻
22:30 — DECOMPRESSION PERIOD
Consume:
• neon candies • blue slushie
Complete Alien: The Cold Forge audiobook or conduct final Alien: Isolation survival attempt.
⸻
FINAL CORPORATE ASSESSMENT
Subject completion status:
████████████████████████ MEDIA EXPOSURE COMPLETE PSYCHOLOGICAL CONDITION: STABLE XENOMORPH PARANOIA: ACCEPTABLE LEVEL
⸻
WEYLAND-YUTANI REMINDER
“Crew expendable. The organism is priceless.”
⸻
If you want, I can also make one more version that is absurdly funny:
“Colonial Marines Operational Weekend Briefing.”
It reads like a military op order where the movies are combat training exercises, and it’s honestly the funniest format of the three.
you would think the very first thing as leader of Iran would be to clear out any aggression against Iran who gives a fuck about US bases in the Middle East you have no fucking say over that. Oh this is just a bullshit attempt for them to again they’re only goal is to keep and retain power. They’re not www.perplexity.ai/page/iran…
Claude needs crushed. www.perplexity.ai/page/anth…
Wrong group, wrong idea.
Leave the gays and queers and lesbians alone to marry and suffer like us straights. However the trannies aka traaaaaaaaaaaaaans are left out in the cold. You cannot give a white man any more rights and power and protected status than the hard left already claims this group has. Except they demand you treat and respect a man in a dress as a “woman”. Nope.
We need speed run the next three. Fuck em. www.perplexity.ai/page/trum…
Holy shit. www.perplexity.ai/page/eon-…
True. Can confirm. Peers drawing up and customizing their own workbenches. www.perplexity.ai/page/turi…
The absolutely only thing you can be guaranteed of: the casino will walk you out. www.perplexity.ai/page/kals…
Someone did not have their s*** encrypted www.perplexity.ai/page/us-s… be
Look at how stupid this fucking bitch is
goddamn America dodged a bullet
www.perplexity.ai/page/harr…
They have Mark Kearny Canada‘s faggot Prime Minister Trying to save the day. Lmao www.perplexity.ai/page/glob…